The word has come up recently in far too many conversations for me to ignore. When that happens, I must explore.
A teacher I highly respect said the other day, "The only thing standing between YOU and EXCELLENCE is AWKWARDNESS."
Then, another teacher and friend posted a meme on facebook, "Excuse me, I am in that awkward stage between birth and death."
And I laughed so hard, it resonated with me simply way too much!
The next day as I taught my regular All-Levels Vinyasa class at Kindness Yoga, well, it was... AWkWArD! Bummer!
Something was pressing me deeper...
Yoga chittra vittri nirodha...
"Yoga is the cessation of the fluctuations of the mind."
(Patanjali, Yoga Sutra 1.2)
What this meant to me:
We can lose the awkward through our practice of yoga. (Gosh, what can we NOT do through yoga?!)
I don't know about you, but I feel most awkward when Eloise is talking to me (haha, little inside my brain joke there!) Seriously though, I have decided to name my awkward self, my vata self that has so much difficulty grounding herself, Eloise. It is the best way I can deal with her, by acknowledging her as a part of me, a part I may not enjoy, but I must embrace. (Because my pitta self is ever so frustrated with her! I have yet to name my pitta self, she doesn't rear her fiery head too often...)
So, when Eloise is talking to me, it is when in any given situation, my mind chatter, the chatter that says a little too loudly, "maybe you should choose the red one, no the blue because it matches your eyes, and oh geez now someone is watching you so you'd better stop looking like a nutter and choose already, oh why are you so indecisive?"
You get me?
When that chatter is too loud, and you give it your attention, that is awkward. And THAT is exactly what is standing between YOU and EXCELLENCE.
Yoga chittra vittri nirodha.
Yoga is the cessation of the fluctuations of the mind.
When we still our mind, we find quiet.
When we find quiet, we are able to listen in.
When we listen in, we hear our own heart speaking softly.
When we hear our own heart, we allow ourselves to speak our truth.
When we speak our truth, we speak from a place of steadfastness and grace. A place of confidence and power.
And that, my friends, is EXCELLENCE.
(Special thanks to Patrick and Ellen!)