My daughter's teacher once said, "My role is not only to guide your child, but also to carefully place obstacles so that she may overcome them."
This thought has stuck with me for years, literally, and it is one I come back to time and again. For my self, but also for my children.
6 months ago I left my husband. I moved out. We have two children.
Divorce is not easy, in fact I could say it is downright hell. However, it is not something that we all, as a family now apart, cannot overcome. And in the process of doing so, we will be stronger.
I have watched this play out in my daughter over the past 6 months. She has always been a sensitive child with an internal strength, yet also easily overwhelmed and likely to give up when faced with a difficult challenge.
Recently though, I have seen her stepping up to challenges, taking control of a situation where she would have usually turned to me, becoming more independent.
This development, some would say, is sad - the loss of innocence, the growing up before we're ready. Yet, I am not abandoning her. I am still her mother, here to guide, to nurture, and yes, to place obstacles.
She is almost 10. I see a resilience in her that I knew was there, but I had not seen shine as it does in recent weeks.
Yes, she still becomes overwhelmed. Yes, she still is easily frustrated. And yes, she is still quite angry. But this too she will overcome. With some gentle guidance, and some careful placement.
Kristen is the creator of Indieflow Yoga and Yoga For A Cause. She lives and teaches in Denver, Colorado